Seva Category: Member Stories

Jess Osie is a Vedic Meditation teacher, mother, and community group facilitator who’s on a mission to empower her meditation students to awaken and embody their deepest essence. At the root of all of Jess’s teachings is a simple, actionable message that allows her and her students to incorporate ancient wisdom directly into the lived experience of modern life. Her personal narratives and insights have never felt more relatable for the modern mother and woman.  

In this conversation, Jess and I speak about the subtle aspects of motherhood that bring extra awareness and bliss to the mundane moments. We dive into what it means to move through our days in a devotional way and to see natural rhythms as our biggest guides and teachers. We also talk about leading by example when it comes to helping our children foster healthy self care and self awareness practices. I hope this conversation inspires a new understanding of surrendering to our sacred role as mothers and gives a new perspective on parenting from the present moment. Enjoy! 

Q: Welcome Jess! How has your background as a Vedic meditation teacher and forever student of the Vedas allowed you to witness your role as mother with more grace, surrender, and devotion?

In the Vedic worldview, there are two forms of surrender – ‘surrender by defeat’ and ‘‘surrender to the feet’. Surrender by defeat is what most people in the west are familiar with – we could experience it as being forced to yield, to unwillingly let go, or feeling victimized.

‘Surrender to the feet’ is an act of surrender with devotion. We actively, consciously and willingly let go of our own individual preference or agenda, and soften and open to what is present in the moment. Letting go of the fallacy of control and the need for perfectionism, that is true surrender.

As a mum, the practice of surrender starts from the very moment we conceive. All of a sudden, our bodies are dedicating themselves to creating a human. As time progresses, we surrender our time, physical energy, conscious attention and mental space. It’s a minute to minute practice to fully surrender to what’s unfolding in each moment. We surrender who we once were, in order to be the mother we are now.

Ultimately, when we surrender with devotion, we are choosing to let go of a personal preference in order for something greater. In the Vedas, we call this ‘yagya’ – a willingness to let go of something precious to us, for a greater experience of the whole. Every moment is a yagya. And when we embrace life in this way, that is when we find grace. You will find an entire chapter in the vedas dedicated to this. 

On a practical level in motherhood, we consciously devote our ‘soma’, or flow of consciousness to our child. We are present with them and for them; to their needs, to their cries, to their desires and even to their tantrums. Ultimately, we surrender deeply so that our child may grow and thrive, whilst we as the mother, can share in the experience with grace and ease. 

Q: Vedic meditation is such a powerful tool for new mothers! In my experience, it’s my anchor amongst all the moving pieces that grab at my attention throughout the day. How has your meditation practice brought depth to your motherhood experiences and why do you believe all mothers should give themselves the space to sit in meditation?

I believe Mothers are the first Guru in a child’s life, meaning, we are their teachers. They imitate our speech, actions, behavior, demeanor and so much more. And we have a responsibility to show up as our best selves and bring that to our journey with them as they grow.

So much of modern society in the western world has us thinking that mothers should be able to do everything on their own, and look perfect whilst doing so. I often wonder, what happened to the village life? What happened to the collective nourishing and honoring the mother for her role in bringing life and creation to the world, and allowing her to do so at her own pace, in the organic rhythm of her and her family? As mothers we spend so much of our time dedicated to the wellbeing of others, and we need to balance this with nourishment and taking time for ourselves.

The practice of Vedic Meditation is a simple and effortless technique where we meet ourselves for 20 minutes twice a day. Time that is purely dedicated to nourishing ourselves and teaching the mind and body how to surrender with ease.

This then becomes a habituated way of Being, and affects the way we respond to daily life. In particular, as a mother, we learn to move and adapt with the changing expectations of daily life, and surrender to the flow of life as it arises. We viscerally experience the mind moving inwards, letting go of the stories, patterns, worries, “shoulds”, and speculations and we connect with our inner truth. 

In this deep connection to Self, both the mind and body are resting very deeply. We know the nature of the body in the state of rest, is to heal, detox and purify. And so, we let go of past experiences, we remove stress from the physiology and we lighten the load we are carrying. This nourishing rest provides us the adaptation energy we require in order to meet the demands of the day. So that we may attend to our babies and children, work, partners and friendships, feeling full and vital – giving from a place of fulfillment as opposed to depletion.

I can think of countless moments where my practice has helped me from tipping over the edge. A good example is in the writing of this blog. I was at home getting Indi ready for daycare and things were moving at a snail-like pace… And Indi was doing the classic “bait and switch”, asking me to do one thing, and then quickly changing her mind and having a tantrum when I didn’t follow along. The window of time I had carved out for writing was fast diminishing and I could feel my frustration rise as Indi continued to delay and delay, demanding for time and attention. I could see that no amount of me pushing or rushing was going to solve anything – it was like swimming upstream in a river. So I surrendered. I allowed myself to embrace the downstream current, be with her and her needs and quickly and creatively re-shuffled my day. In my own experience it’s afforded me the capability to stay deeply present, and calm and attentive to the need of the time.

Q: You and I are both exploring what “slow motherhood” looks like for ourselves and our families. What inspired you to pause, access the pace of your rhythms, and ultimately come to the realization that a slower pace (with more intention) might be the perfect salve?

I think life as a mother is a tender and delicate balance. For me, between my devotion to our community of mediators and to being a present mother, can at times, I can often feel I’m being pulled in many directions.. As mothers we wear so many hats, it can be easy to just go through the list and tick the boxes. And to feel as if we are constantly in a space of ‘doing’ rather than ‘Being’. So for me, the idea of ‘slow motherhood’ isn’t about choosing between roles, I have learnt that it’s more about living ‘intentionally’. 

In the midst of 2020, I found myself saying, “I can’t do it all”. I was mothering my 2 year old, running my own business, supporting our community of students, running a household and being a loving wife. And in that, I saw that realizing and saying out loud, “I can’t do it all” actually gave me such relief. It’s not that I didn’t have the capability to do all those things, but rather practically, there are too many hats, and too little time to wear them all. And so I decided to re-assess and dream up what it would be like for me to slow down and move with more intention through my days.

With so much of the collective measuring their worth against how much they achieve, it was important for me to honor the process and let it unfold organically, choosing to align with my own rhythms and family’s needs, as opposed to some “idea” of what it’s all supposed to look like. It has meant deciding what’s most important and prioritizing that, doing that well, with joy and grace and either delegating or simply letting go of the other stuff.

Intentionality for our little family means having space on the weekends for us to decide what feels best in the moment, it might be a spontaneous trip to the markets, to the park or simply grounding at home. Tony and I have a monthly planning session that we call ‘Dreamtime’ – a term borrowed from Australian Indigenous culture that relates to the creation and storytelling of the world. In these sessions, we dream up not only what’s possible for the next month, but what it would look like to live in alignment with our highest values, to feel utter joy in our creative expression and to give of ourselves to our family, community and greater world in the most impactful way.

Q: The ability to fully embody our roles as mothers often comes with the understanding of the sacredness in the mundane. How have you transformed your personal practice (before motherhood) to be more of a “living practice” now that you are a mother?

The other day I was preparing Indi’s school lunch. It’s always a big rush to get out in the morning and, amongst a sea of other tasks (and mentally preparing for a day of work), the preparing of food was by no means a glamorous task. From one perspective, it’s just another little check-box item that needs to get done. But on the other hand, it’s an opportunity to infuse my own soma (flow of consciousness) into the food that will nourish her for the day.  

It’s as if, on one side of the river is the riverbank of the mundane. On the other side is the riverbank of sacredness. Between these two banks the river, the lived experience of motherhood is roaring with intensity.  

I‘ve always said that motherhood is a test of one’s enlightenment. All the spiritual practices and learning done prior to having a baby are literally put to the test. It’s one thing to have beautiful knowledge and wisdom, and it’s another to integrate, embody and apply it – particularly when there’s so much demand as is in Motherhood.

But the mundane is all there is. It’s moment to moment, real life experience. And much of the time we aren’t being watched or witnessed, meaning that who we truly are is exactly who shows up. The question we must ask ourselves is, who do we want to be? Behind closed doors? How do we want to live life when all that matters is our direct experience and not our perceived experience? Which side of the river do we want to live our life from?

And silently, we practice. We practice devotion and surrender in the smallest moments, as well as the biggest. We experience awareness in the present moment by coming to our five senses and grounding in the here and now.

Q: Daily rhythms and rituals can be the guiding pulse, providing steadiness throughout the day and changing seasons. What rhythms (routines) or rituals have you found offers the most nourishment for the times?

Vedic Meditation, of course, has been the backbone and number one support during my entire motherhood journey. Throughout my pregnancy, birth and well into postpartum, it’s been a space in which I connect with my deepest essence. It’s also incredibly nourishing, as it’s time and space that’s just for me. 

I also found, during my studies and experiences of Ayurveda, I have connected deeply with my cycles and natural rhythms that reflect Nature’s rhythms. I absolutely love my moon cycle and as best as I can, carve out time alone and in silence on the first 1-2 days so that I can connect with my womb, let go of anything that is no longer serving me and detect the seedlings of new intentions to come forth. 

It’s important for me to create structure through rhythm and ritual, so that I am able to access more flow. For example, this year, Tony and I have created a new ritual where we sit at the beginning of the week and go through our various scheduling, admin and to do lists. We start with an intention and end by placing important pieces like flowers, crystals and talismans on our ‘Brahmasthan’ which is the energy centre of our home. We then end the ritual by offering each other a blessing or intention for the week. We’ve found that by doing our weekly ritual in this way, we ground in the sacredness of our home. It then acts as an anchor for us throughout the week.

Q: So much of motherhood is lived in full surrender to what is. What does prayer or devotion mean to you and how does it influence your ability to surrender to the larger cosmic orchestra at any given moment?

Devotion to me, is the highest form of love. It means giving from a place of fulfillment, rather than duty, depletion or guilt.

t’s an experience of our divinity and it occurs when we are fulfilled within. We must give and show devotion to ourselves and not only to others. Being devoted to the practices that keep us balanced and nourished, allows for a generous giving of our energy and soma, or flow of consciousness. 

Life is like the waves, made of ebbs and flows. It’s a long beautiful river flowing downstream. When we fully surrender, from a deep, heart felt space, we can embrace what is and move alongside the flow, not against it.

In moments of tenderness, or when I feel I’m being particularly challenged, I dig deep and ask myself to fully lean in to the moment, rather than lean out. Being able to control is an illusion. Leaning in, is never as bad as the mind projects it to be. In that way, we can consciously choose to align with nature, with our surroundings and with what is happening in the present moment, rather than resist it.

Q: Both of our daughters are reaching that age where our own personal practices become their personal practice. What simple mindful activities do you do with your daughter to bring intentionality into the flow of her day? How has she adapted these activities and made them her own?

Rather than teaching her my practices, I try to follow her rhythms. Kids are naturally and spontaneously mindful because they are so fully present. They see and observe things that most people don’t notice. They find joy in the total mundane. I would say that our children force us to be present because everything in their world is happening NOW, and it’s a big deal. 

This year, we’ve also carved out time for a special day, just for Indi and I. We call it “girls’ day”. I book time away from work and chores and spend the whole time with her, fully present and available. We often start the day by me asking her how she wants to spend it and we go from there! That’s a personal practice that we now share.

Of course, Indi has grown up with meditation being part of her worldview. Right from in the womb, she has been exposed to and shared the biochemistry of meditation. From early on in her life, I would meditate whenever I got a chance, whether it be in the car if she fell asleep, or after I had finished breastfeeding  (in Vedic Meditation, we have a special program for newborn mothers to support them in catching up on rest).

Nowadays when I teach meditation courses, Indi gets upset if she can’t meet our “new meditation friends”, she often gets her way and we end up starting the class with her on my lap. Meditation is completely normalized in her world. And when she’s ready, I will teach her the kids technique where children receive a ‘word of wisdom”, similar to a mantra (emphasizing that the choice to learn will always be hers).

Since Indi was 11 days old, she received an abhyanga (Ayurvedic massage) before bath and bed. In Ayurveda, we recognize the importance of physical touch and how that can be extremely grounding and pacifying for anyone, especially babies and children. Since Indi was one, she was determined to do her own abhyanga (cutest sight ever) and also kindly helps me in the morning to do mine. 

I truly feel through this organic way of exposing and including Indi in our practices, we have supported her to build an awareness of self-care, and it has further nourished and balanced her to be a stable and blissful kid.

Q: For those seeking a deeper sense of ease and gratitude in their motherhood journey (but don’t know where to start), what would you tell them? What was most helpful for you in those beginning transformational years?

Firstly, be kind and gentle with yourself. You are doing your best in every given moment. 

The second, is that it’s hard to feel grateful or have a sense of ease when we are operating from deep depletion. Naturally, if our body is in a state of ‘lack’, the mind will feel that too. So it’s important to seek support. The kind of nourishing support that brings you into a sense of balance. 

And of course community – I feel collectively we are starting to remember our tribal nature. We’re realising the importance of leaning on others who have come before us and are walking the path beside us. It truly takes a village to raise our babies, and ourselves as Mothers too. 

And lastly, learn Vedic Meditation. It’s an absolute game-changer for the transformational journey of Motherhood – nourishing us deeply on a physical and emotional level, replenishing our adaptation energy, gaining greater awareness, connecting us to the present moment, and learning the art of surrender. More gratitude and ease will flow naturally from these states.

Please reach out if you’d like me to connect you with a teacher in your area.

Q: Any “must-read/must-see” resources you’d like to share to inspire mothers to live more with the present moment?

❋ Vedic Mama’s Circle is a 5-week journey dedicated to honoring and nurturing the sacred role of mother. Through exploring the practical application of Vedic wisdom, weekly exercises and a supportive community, we uncover the beauty and wisdom inherent in this ongoing personal evolutionary process.

❋ Our Seva Blog is such a beautiful resource that offers conscious and supportive ways to understand the journey of motherhood.

❋ SunChild Affirmation Cards – Positive affirmation cards for children to support kids’ light at every stage of growth 

❋ The Conscious Parent by Dr Shefali Tsabari is a well-known book for parents. She helps us to understand that the parenting journey is actually a process of self-discovery in order to empower our children.

❋ Gentle Birth, Gentle Mothering by Dr Sarah Buckley. I love this woman and her deep, embodied understanding of the physicality of Motherhood from her medical background.

❋ Birth Time is an incredible documentary made be three Australian women on a mission to revolutionize the landscape of birth and empower women to make aligned choices when it comes to birthing.

❋ Nature is our greatest resource – go for a dip in the ocean, walk amongst the trees, feel your bare feet on the grass, breathe.

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Kamala Santos of Soma Doula, is an Ayurvedic Postpartum and Life Transitions Doula who has dedicated her path of practice towards selflessly serving (seva) women during transitional times. She beautifully pairs her inner wisdom with ancient wisdom coming from the Yogic and Ayurvedic traditions, which allows her to tend to new mothers and their families with a unique full body, mind and soul approach. 

In this conversation, we dive into the ‘newborn mother’ experience (the first 40 days postpartum) and offer up some perspective and lifestyle strategies for navigating this tender time with more grace and resilience. I hope this conversation inspires deep nourishment, and if you enjoy this topic, please check out PART ONE: Ayurvedic Postpartum Support For The First 40 Days with Kamala Santos.

Q: Welcome back Kamala! For those who missed last week’s interview, can you share your perspective on why Ayurveda offers a more sustainable and holistic approach to wellness for mothers no matter what stage we are in?

The term Ayurveda can be defined as ‘the science of life,’ encompassing the full arc of life from birth to death. It points towards a rich and profound tradition of holistic philosophy for life’s longevity. These centuries-old practices have refined the interrelationship of body, mind and spirit.

The axiom, “The first 42 days will impact the next 42 years” confirms this important conviction Ayurveda holds toward the longevity of a woman’s life.

During the first 40 days specifically, a new mom’s physiology is swiftly and dramatically altered. Ayurvedic postpartum protocols are always designed to be a very personalized approach—customizing diet to support digestion through herbs and food, regular oil massages, practices to aid in sleep and calming the mind.

Curious to know what led Kamala towards this path of service? Check out part one of this interview → Part One: Ayurvedic Postpartum Support For The First 40 Days

Q: I like to call anything beyond the first 6 months of motherhood as the “forever postpartum”. Can you provide us with a few practical tips for bringing about a sense of steadiness and ease for those women who are navigating this continually transformative season of life?

The simple reminders below are meant to help ease the way and cultivate a stable attitude, so that your motherly intuition and confidence are readily available to you throughout your parenting journey. The essence is to pick a few that resonate and keep it simple.

❋ Prioritize Non-Negotiable Self-Care: When we do not prioritize our own self-care because we are busy serving others, our energy never gets the opportunity to replenish itself. Instead, we find ourselves perpetually exhausted, and our abilities are compromised. The best way to prevent this imbalance is to take 30-60 minutes for yourself, everyday…non-negotiable. Building in this practice creates a family environment where rest, rejuvenation, quiet and energy repair are part of the daily rhythm and seen as the family’s grounding pulse. When mom is happy, everyone is happy.  This doesn’t necessarily mean catching up on to-do lists or hygiene routines, but rather, it may look like simply sitting still in a form of meditation or rekindling old joys. Everyday, discover a way to connect with yourself (pre-baby), and make it a priority. 

❋ Reflect & Fine Tune Daily: This may be a beautiful time to create a new routine in the form of daily check ins, self inquiry and reflection, giving yourself the opportunity to spot areas where extra support is needed. If you’re someone who appreciates goal setting, potentially create a sleep goal for yourself during this time to ensure you are getting the rest you need. Nurturing sustainable habits strengthen our inner resolution as mothers and allow yourself  to feel guided from the wisdom within. 

❋ Cultivate Inner Resolution & Agency: Cultivate a clear point of view for your personal expression of Motherhood so that you do not confuse the map for the road.  Ask yourself, What will cultivate a fierce conviction beyond time, beyond goals within my role as mother? Dwelling within a firm viewpoint, saved me when I wanted to be anywhere but in Motherhood. It’s important to gently remind yourself that this map (or viewpoint) is not the road, but merely a guide helping you mark the terrain. Use this inner resolution as inspiration and not a generator of the all too familiar motherhood case of the “shoulds”. You may decide to hold this very unique map quietly and close or share it with a trusted partner /friend so that you have the support system if you feel a little lost. 

❋ Create Your Personalized Rhythm: Ayurveda relies on seasonal and daily routines to stabilize the elements and create an inner environment that feels balanced and nourished. Creating a customized structure, routine or rhythm for yourself and your family will help stabilize a new world order, dissolving the intensity of the first 6 months post birth. Let your direct experience and your intuition shape and guide you and don’t hesitate to pair your inner wisdom with time-tested guidance and ancient wisdom from traditions you trust and admire. Keep the structure simple, as you develop your skills and practices that nourish the new you. Maybe it’s as simple as integrating a few dinacharya (daily routines) of Ayurvedic self care, a little exercise, quiet time, or resting when the baby rests. Don’t forget to bring the “slow and steady”, “it can wait” and the “better than nothing’ mantra along with you.

❋ Foster Friendship: The investment in friendship (maitri) is the greatest ally you will have down the path of motherhood. Through friendship we have the opportunity to develop the virtues of generosity, compassion, patience and forgiveness, all translatable virtues to be practiced in the presence of our children.

Q: For mothers seeking a deeper sense of surrender and presence on a daily basis, what do you think is the low-hanging fruit as far as a good starting place?

In order to fully surrender to the present moment, we must continually practice deep listening. This is the language that is directly connected to the heart.

When we listen deeply we strengthen our ability to hear the essence of what was said, with less misunderstanding. As mothers and caregivers, listening is a true devotional practice, where we listen to the spoken and unspoken as if our  and our child’s  life depends upon it.

The children’s book called, The Sound of Silence by Katrina Goldsaito is a tender reminder of the beauty in deep listening and awakens an awareness of a secret language. 

From my viewpoint the deepest surrender came through an insightful moment when I learned the child is only a gift temporarily given to our care, and a gift that acts as our greatest spiritual teacher. In a sense, mothering is the ultimate babysitter, allowing us the practice of devotion.  Devotion is such a beautiful concept. Yes… motherhood is thankless, yet it is the highest practice clearing out misplaced desire and attitudes for a fulfilling motherhood experience. We are the comforter, the guardian, the teacher of love, the self, the emotional management system, relationship builder, navigator of worldly pleasures and desires, etc.  

The ongoing refinement of our relationship of our role as Mother is a gift to self, your child and ultimately to the world.  

 

– – – – – –

Kamala, I want to thank you for your devotion to this interview. You’ve beautifully outlined practical tools and resources for our newborn and forever postpartum mothers. If you enjoyed the tips and resources shared with this interview, please check out PART ONE: Ayurvedic Postpartum Support For The First 40 Days with Kamala Santos.

Sign Up for the Our Seva Community Newsletter!

Each week, expect a bite-sized personal reflection with accompanying journal prompt. My hope is that by sharing these reflections and prompts, you’ll be inspired into purposeful action and we’ll both be reassured that we are not alone in this process of unraveling.

Once a month, expect a curation of resources intended to inspire a deeper personal practice. There will be Q&A interviews to showcase how other women in this community navigate transformation, articles and podcasts that have made a lasting impression and practical mindfulness exercises to bring about sustainable change.

Sign up link here →

Kamala Santos of Soma Doula, is an Ayurvedic Postpartum and Life Transitions Doula who has dedicated her path of practice towards selflessly serving (seva) women during transitional times. She beautifully pairs her inner wisdom with ancient wisdom coming from the Yogic and Ayurvedic traditions, which allows her to tend to new mothers and their families with a unique full body, mind and soul approach. 

In this conversation, we dive into the ‘newborn mother’ experience (the first 40 days postpartum) and offer up some perspective and lifestyle strategies for navigating this tender time with more grace and resilience. I hope this conversation inspires deep nourishment, and if you enjoy this topic, please check out PART TWO: ‘Forever Postpartum’ Ayurvedic Support with Kamala Santos.

Q: Welcome Kamala! As an Ayurvedic Postpartum Doula, can you share your perspective on why Ayurveda offers a more sustainable and holistic approach to wellness for our newborn mothers?

The term Ayurveda can be defined as ‘the science of life,’ encompassing the full arc of life from birth to death. It points towards a rich and profound tradition of holistic philosophy for life’s longevity. These centuries-old practices have refined the interrelationship between body, mind and spirit. The axiom, “The first 42 days will impact the next 42 years” confirms this important conviction that Ayurveda holds toward the longevity of a woman’s life.

As a new mom, your physiology is swiftly and dramatically altered. Ayurvedic postpartum protocols are designed to be very personalized (for whom and when)—customizing diet to support digestion through herbs and food, regular oil massages, and abundant practices to aid in sleep and calming the mind. It’s designed to help shift the postpartum experience from the all too familiar “falling off a cliff” feeling into a nourishing and loving transition. While supporting mothers, these practices also help build a lovely safety net for the entire family, allowing the whole family to become more adaptable.

Q: What led you to this path of supporting women and mothers, specifically during this transformative time?

After decades of practicing yoga I felt I hit a wall, something was missing. During my Yoga Therapy training, Ayurveda was introduced and concepts started to click into place.  The marriage of the two sciences felt more complete and a void was filled. A few years later, during an Ayurveda bodywork training, I experienced and witnessed profound and unspoken nourishment in the many layers of the body, mind and spirit. It was a realization that this type of care was like a dance, a beautiful meditation between the receiver and giver.

After a few years of assisting with panchakarma purification retreats, I was asked to aid a mom and child as they moved into a new home and community. The mother was extremely depleted.  During our 10-day retreat together I got to use my breadth of skills and landed in my sweet spot at pure rejuvenation (rasayana).  

Together we created rhythms and routine, the sense of safety, nourishing meal plans, playfulness, restorative yoga nidra, ceremony, ritual, and a lot of bodywork. This was when my “seva” (selfless service) had been fully realized. 

That which I had not myself received in motherhood, was found. While giving, I was receiving unconditionally. I furthered studies with the uniqueness of the first 42 days postpartum and now work with newborn moms, and those families who find them in any major transition (including the sacredness of the end-of-life rite of passage).

Q: During any period of massive change, but especially during the first few months post-birth, our personal practice and family rhythms can easily fall out of sync. For our new mothers, can you provide a few practical tips for bringing about a sense of balance and ease?

Ayurveda recognizes the first six weeks as a time of great increase in the wind and space elements (vata) and therefore, most practices are there to stabilize and return misplaced vata. Wind and space are “energy” qualities that are reflected in the state of our nervous system, digestion, mind, endocrine & lymphatic systems, and through all of our senses. When vata is imbalanced, it is very easy for brain fog, depression and other mood disorders to settle into the extra spaciousness that is present. This is why Ayurveda suggests the first 42 days should be spent in a warm “nest”, cocooning to avoid overstimulation, to create a safe space, to feel fully nourished in the quietude of profound change and emerging love. These skills and attitudes (listed below) can easily be  planned and prepared before postpartum.

❋ Get Sleep: Nothing rocks the boat more than lack of sleep, impacting recovery, the ability to absorb nutrition and understanding the babies signals.  Learning to nap can be a challenging obstacle, especially the first three weeks where you are targeting upward of 14-17 hours of rejuvenating (non-continuous) sleep. “Sleep when the baby sleeps” is wisdom that should not be ignored and supported by the entire household. If you are having trouble sleeping, consider brushing up on your overall sleep hygiene and explore some bedtime drink elixirs, yogic practices or possibly even yoga nidra to send you off to sleep.

❋ Nourishment Through Food: The postpartum diet follows a weekly protocol of foods to avoid and eat, with easily digestible foods and warming spices. Generally, these include sweet flavors, warm and cooked meals with lots of liquid components. There are many useful books to support the weekly and seasonal considerations of a new mom’s diet. As an Ayurvedic postpartum doula it is my job to modify daily meals, while observing how mom is eliminating, digesting, and using her energy. It’s all about supporting healthy digestion! After the first 5-10 days, easing into a robust meal plan may look like breakfast, snack (optional), lunch, snack, dinner, and then a sleepy elixir. Just like a new baby, try to eat every 3-4 hours.

❋ Fortify With Oil: Nothing calms the nervous system, brings nourishment to the seven bodily tissues, and cleanses more effectively than oil, primarily ghee. Although there are many applications of oil (internally and externally), the easiest and most practical way to incorporate fortifying with oil is including ghee into your diet and performing a warm body oil (abhyanga) with sesame oil on a daily basis.  Just by doing these two things alone, you would be gaining 70%+ of the value full oileation protocol provides!

❋ Protect Your Energy: There are about 14 common energy leaking ‘portals’ that blow wide open, leaking your precious energy when the air and space elements (vata) are imbalanced. The most common symptoms of leaks are a racing mind, anxiety, excessive talking, withdrawal, little to no energy, frustration, and anger etc.  You want to learn to be intimate with your energy states, to develop sensitivity to your inherent wisdom and learn your true desires.  It is important to know how the mind, pushed by excess wind, can feed these leaks, hamstringing the adaptability needed to ride the transitional waves instead of succumbing to the tidal wave of depletion. When we support the nervous system and our energy output, we wrap ourselves in a “feel good” bubble that is at our disposal thanks to the hormone, dopamine. We can learn to activate this emergency switch, to plug the leaks, and operate in the love bubble of motherhood.

❋ Ride The Waves of Emotions: No one talks about the grief that might accompany birth,  although there are plenty of conversations of joy. A  mother will experience the full range of human emotions during this transitional time, including grief. If we know to pay attention to grief’s messages, we could ask for what we need or at least acknowledge what we don’t have.  It’s incredibly important to process the energy of grief and fully allow yourself to mourn who you once were or the things that may have not gone as planned. In the grief love can be found.From the yogic point of view, thoughts and emotions (mind) are so deeply intertwined it is considered two sides of the same coin and it can be a big drain on energy to incessantly try to untangle them. There are depleting consequences (anxiety, excessive speaking, withdrawal, aggregation, and depression). With a little awareness, a little practice, and a lot of grace, the mind is nurtured to arise naturally and recede naturally to abide more easily in the loving moments of motherhood.

When needed, there is no shame in asking for help and guidance. Asking for support is one of the many first courageous actions of motherhood.

❋ Gently Move Your Body: “Slow and steady” is the mantra for any new mom. With this mindset and gentle movement paired with rhythmic breath, a mother can build soft mobility in her joints and aid in her recovery by stimulating the lymphatic system. Heavily modified yogic practices can be performed in bed, a chair such as Joint Freeing Series, Palm Tree flow, Sunbird and Bridge vinyasas as well as a super supported modification of ‘legs up the wall’ are generally acceptable to do with the guidance of a doula/teacher. There is also my favorite ‘blow before you go’ mnemonic, which is a posture/stance combined with an intentional strong exhale to help trigger the transverse abs, stabilize the pelvis and core in a steady stance, fully empty of breath and engaged abs before picking up the baby. This breath/body triggering goes well to protect you from injury as the baby moves to become toddler weight.

Q: The transition and transformation into our role as “Mother” often feels indescribable. Do you have any tips for ways new mothers can honor the less tangible aspects of their journey?

The beauty of Ayurveda is that it considers happiness or our quality of life (sukha), to be a fundamental right of every living being.

A pleasant mind is defined as a prerequisite characteristic of health. Although there are many tangible means, (ex: diet, exercise, yoga, meditation, etc) to support uncertainty and face the realities of change, it’s just as important to recognize and surrender ourselves to the beautiful journey and the lessons that are waiting.  In Sanskrit, the word Bhāvanā is used to represent ‘awareness cultivation’, ‘creative contemplation’, and ‘feeling into what is’. This is the backbone of surrendering to our experience.

❋ Surrender To The Awe: Mothers are gifted with the mysterious and perfect rapid crash course in impermanence. At a time when you are completely stripped of what you thought was your foundation, the milestones of change are flying at you all while navigating fatigue, complex new emotions. It’s a playground for the direct experience of impermanence. Willingly (or not) you are shedding your old self identity (maiden), overwhelmed by a new role (mother) and mesmerized by the wonders brought to you by your baby. Watch your child and notice these little ones are not analyzing what was past or future, but instead are fully present, authentic, and acting without judgment.During the early days of motherhood there are many opportunities to sink into the experience of the awe and wonder of your new reality. It’s a beautiful reminder that these moments will end and that you are fully alive, fresh and new. It is in those weeks that you can surrender to the most profound lessons and later devote lifetimes to these rich teachings.

❋ Honor Your Rite of passage: Celebrate the passage of six weeks by intention of leaving the nest of liminal space, this profound beginning phase of postpartum.. Consider reviving this time with the joy and anticipation of a baby shower or new baby blessingway (keep it simple, you are exhausted!). Gather your friends and loved ones to recognize and celebrate this transition with flowers, food, and simple festivity. Recount the many birth stories you were told, and add your own to the collection.

Q: How could adopting a nourishing personal practice act as an anchor for women on the path towards and through motherhood?

Some things in life appear to be very fluid, while others feel like a big anchor, grounding us in timelessness and sustainability. My personal favorite ways to anchor down and feel truly supported/nourished in any situation is with the use of breath observation, body scanning as a meditation and through daily self-inquiry rituals.

❋ Try This – Body Scanning & Breath: When in a seated meditation you can gently scan your body with your mind – forehead, eyes, cheek, mouth, neck, etc. As you pass through each part of the body, use your intention to relax every muscle, letting the entire body rest deeply into the bones.  You can do this same practice by scanning your attitudes and emotions that pop into your mind, and relax or not engage them. The simple goal is to be in a sense of surrender, to be open and aware, allowing for full relaxation and rhythm of breath to be your anchor.  You can begin this practice by tuning into the cycle of breath (gentle, full 2-5 sec inhale and exhale) with gentle one pointed concentration (drishti) counting with the mind 1,2,3… for each cycle,  then adding awareness of relaxing the body through each breath cycle. Let the breath cycle be slow and rhythmic, this neurologically reconnects the heart and mind and helps reset the balance of the sympathetic/parasympathetic nervous system. With this centering of body, speech and mind you should feel concentration paired with focus on counting and relaxation of body simultaneously. If you lose count, or tighten up, start over.  The “sit” or meditation doesn’t have to be formal. As you cultivate first attention in the body, speech and mind, in time this awareness becomes ingrained and can move second attention skills. This ability to have 50% focus on the outer world and 50% focus on the inner world becomes a great yogic skill for longevity and awareness. A tattva bhavana practice of motherhood is this gentle observational skill. It’s our skill as mothers to sense the natural flow, paving the path for clear intuitive action.  This sense of agency is the greatest practice in yoga, when we pause to consider our own union of our actions — body, speech and mind.

❋ Try This – Self Inquiry Rituals: How will you know where you are going if you don’t know yourself first? This self-inquiry is the timeless anchor of motherhood and where the depth of strength and stamina, conviction and fortitude, agency and compassion arise.  Self-inquiry paired with self-effort and devotion are at the heart of yoga & Ayurveda. In the beginning self-inquiry may be a simple practice. The simple question ,  “What is up or needed today?” when you first awake (or from a nap) begins the process, and is sadly often overlooked rushing to the task at hand. In your response, listen for what is succinct and brief, terse and direct, try not to ponder too too long, or analyze.  Be gentle with yourself if the answer you receive isn’t what you expected. In time, the self-inquiry moves towards extended focus and contemplation allowing the opportunity to dig deeper. There is a beautiful teaching that says, “Contemplate deeply for the answer to be revealed. Once you have an answer, no need to return to the question.”

Some of my favorite self-inquiry and contemplative opportunities for new mothers (when there is capacity) often considered when nursing v. social feed scrolling are:
❋ What is my ‘right view’ of motherhood so that obstacles can become opportunity.
❋ How can I meet my choices with a sense of sheer delight, to live a life with no regrets.
❋ How do I view impermanence and surrender while on this path.

Q: Any “must-read/must-see” resources for mothers navigating the early days of motherhood?

The Complete Book of Ayurvedic Home Remedies by Vasant Lad

Living Ayurveda by Claire Ragozzino (Ayurvedic recipes, rituals and yoga practices)

Nourishing Newborn Mothers by Julia Jones

The First Forty Days by Heng Ou

Infant Massage Handbook by Vimala McClure

Empowered Postpartum Care An online course by Sacred Window Studies

Pregnancy & Postpartum Blog Series by Banyan Botanicals

The Pure Motive  A blog post on Hareesh.org

Postnatal Yoga by Jillian Woods

10% Happier  An app for those new to meditation

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