Member Stories Archives - Page 2 of 3

Nena Complo on Intentional Self Care & Creating Space

,Member Stories,Q&A

Nena Complo is a mama of 3, holistic doula and yoga teacher who is devoted to reconnecting the modern women with what it means to live embodied in our roles as women, mothers, and caregivers. As a dear friend of mine, Nena and I often find ourselves sitting down to a long chat on Zoom, processing through whatever has been on our hearts. Oftentimes, these lovely conversations spark an internal fire and collaborative spirit that creates transformative dialogue for our larger motherhood communities. We are excited to share a chat we had recently about the power of intuitive self care practices and how those practices ultimately create the space we need to live a life with more devotion and more ease. Enjoy!

Q: Welcome, Nena! There seems to be quite the disconnect between personal practice and the lives of modern women. What does personal practice mean to a mama of three who has a work-from-home business, steady partnership, and truly devotes herself to passion projects?

Daily practice means intentionality. These days, it’s primarily a movement-based practice that is a combination of yoga/stretching, breathing, and dance…where dance is essential and all the movement is intentional. I have personally found the power in a simple 2-5 minute check-in that no longer is seen as an item on my to-do list for the day. There is a lot more flexibility and fluidity as I advance my practice over the years.

For the longest time, I would have referred to my “personal practice” as solely my time on the mat doing yoga. Today it’s a lot more all-encompassing, with very little strings attached. It’s a moment of prayer. Even if it’s a movement-based practice, I still regard that time as prayer.

One additional layer, I consider certain weekly rhythms part of my “practice”. I attend a weekly dance class and a weekly healing session and both of those add more depth to the practice.

Q: At the root of all intentional efforts is a support structure that creates the container for fluidity. How have you personally created a support structure around your personal practice and how has “practice” become a lifestyle for you and your family?

For our family, we have come to a place where personal practice is a tenant of our family structure. It has become a norm that at some point during the day, Mama will have a moment of “centering time” and my family has the understanding of this expectation. It’s become a WE activity in the sense that this time is fully supported by my husband and this time is considered one of our daily priorities.

It wasn’t always like this. I had my first two children very close together during a time when my husband’s job was very demanding. I was experiencing an extended period of extreme depletion and was brought to a breakdown moment. I believe it was this time period that really solidified the importance of practice and self care.

Self care is more than just little rituals to bring you back to center. It’s about how you carry yourself, the relationships that you keep close, and the type of work that you find fulfilling. All of these considerations are part of the structure that supports sustainable self care.

Q: Understanding which self care acts feel the most nourishing and supportive, it’s much easier to see the potency in practicing within micro moments. What would be your go-to, 5 minute micro moment?

I really try my best to commit to the 20-30 minute daily practice (usually first thing in the morning), but the micro moments can be the piece that keeps everything sustainable. Some days, it’s those micro moments that offer the most juice and feel the most uplifting and nourishing. When I practice re-centering myself throughout the day (in those micro moments), I opt for things that bring me to the present moment like getting outside, moving my body gently in a forward fold, applying oil to my body, taking some long slow breath (or alternate nostril breathing), and dance! Over time, I’ve been able to really fine-tune what will be the biggest bang for my buck. It’s been a process of deep listening.

Q: In order to take the pressure off of personal practice, it is my belief that we need to shift the cultural narrative around what it means to have time and space to tune in. How do we shift the narrative away from “that would be nice” and towards a more attainable and sustainable dialogue?

Here’s the deal. As women and mother’s, it’s essential that we connect with whatever we deem to be “sacred” on a regular basis. Whether this is God, Divine Mother, Spirit, Nature…we need to go there. Reconnecting with the sacred in this way builds the WHY when faced with “wouldn’t it be nice” comments. How could you possibly go a day without it?

For me, I’ve never felt triggered by the idea of “practice” and have always seen it as an act of self devotion that comes with the sky’s-the-limit attitude. Our only job as practitioners is to go deeper and deeper into practice each time we show up. There is no “goal” to be achieved or destination in mind.

From my observation, Mothers know what they want and need. There is just a lot of unnecessary muck (shame & guilt) getting in the way of us claiming this space. What is needed is more support for those women and mothers dedicated to healing their wounds and beliefs around shame and guilt. We do not need to seek permission, as this permission comes from within.

Q: Everyone is at a different place in regard to their relationship to practice. Some are steady on the path, others have fallen off the path and desire a reconnection, and others haven’t quite jumped in just yet… What do you feel is the low-hanging fruit that every woman/mama can incorporate TODAY to help swoop us back into rhythm?

I can see this going a few ways… 5 minutes a day, intuitive action, and simple awareness.

01 – If you’ve established some sort of practice at some point or know what feels nourishing but haven’t quite brought those aspects to life consistently/sustainability, just start doing that “thing” for 5 minutes a day. 5 minutes can be incredibly powerful when you’re craving that reconnection.

02 – If you haven’t identified your “thing”, this is your time to approach practice with a spirit of exploration and experimentation. Opt for actions and movements that feel intuitive to your body and mind. (For me, this is dance.)

03 –If you need another strategy, adopt any mindfulness practice (ex: breath work, gratitude practice, meditation) that allows you to experience those subtleties from within. Those whispers from your inner wisdom will guide you towards what feels nourishing, supportive, and creatively fueling. And then listen more intently, more often.

Q: If you were going to devote yourself to any micro moment for the next 40 days, what would it be?

I’m seeking to create a nourishing community in which all women participating are deeply devoted to their own personal practice and infuse that essence of sacredness into all that they do. When women gather from this place of deep inner commitment, we meet as equals, as companions, and are able to thrive from the support of one another. For me to create this for myself, I’m devoting these next 40 days to diving into the creative process with focus, clarity and organic flow.

Would you rather listen to the interview?

What does personal practice mean to you?

Support Structure For Sustainable Self Care

Your 5 Minute Micro Moment

Shifting Cultural Narratives

Some Low-Hanging Fruit

Devoted For 40 Days

Jacintha Field on Blissful Mothering & Conscious Parenting

,Inner & Ancient Wisdom,Member Stories

Jacintha Field, mama, motivational speaker and wellness coach, shares how her unexpected launch into motherhood opened up the door to live a life with more presence, intention and depth that only comes with sobriety. Jacintha, an Our Seva Motherhood Circle community member has witnessed the power in like-minded women rallying behind the awakening of our intuition and building trust in our motherly instincts. I’m excited to share how the birth of a mother can be the birth of a whole new enlightened day-to-day.

Q: Where are you on the path of motherhood – preconception, pregnancy, postpartum (less than 1 year) or forever postpartum (1+ year)?

I am a very proud mumma to my 6-year-old soul baby, Axel.

Q: Can you tell us about your transformative path to motherhood?

My journey started when I was 32 and it was quite a surprise. I always knew I wanted to be a mumma, but I wanted to control the journey. I thought I needed to be married, be settled and buy a house first. But like motherhood, my little guy had other ideas in store for me. When I became pregnant, I instantly knew this was a true blessing. But the start of my pregnancy was quite a rollercoaster ride. At 5/6 weeks, there was a 50% chance the pregnancy wouldn’t continue. I spent the week anxiously waiting and praying that my embryo would connect and grow. There is something very special about motherhood. A bond can be instant and for me, I felt that energetic connection very early on. So when the doctor told me that my little tadpole had survived the journey, I was so relieved. I had never felt happier. I was going to be a mumma!

I always read about how women loved being pregnant. How they flourished during their pregnancies and I was hopeful that my journey would be the same. However, for the first 4 1/2 months of pregnancy, it was not the picture I had envisioned. I felt hungover. I craved greasy foods. I couldn’t understand how anyone loved this feeling and honestly, I was a mess. A usually super healthy human was eating KFC 5 days in a row. My body craved carbs and a lot of them. But when the fog lifted coming into my 5th month of pregnancy, the feelings of bliss kicked in. The connection I first felt grew deeper. I adored feeling the butterfly kicks, knowing that this time during pregnancy wasn’t for me. I was creating life.

My birth was a blessing. I was 10 days overdue, induced, and had a four-hour labour. It sounds wonderful, but being induced is often referred to as a train wreck. I was dancing and jumping on a fit ball, physically and mentally ready with the knowledge from my calm birth classes and meditation music on hand. The next minute, I was face-planted (side-planted I should say) on the bed. I couldn’t move as my contractions escalated from 0 to 100 in a matter of minutes. The TENS machine didn’t do anything. All the prep I did was thrown out the window. I didn’t have a birth plan as such. Although I preferred a natural birth, I wanted to go in with no expectations. My only plan was to “birth a baby” and however that happened, I was OK with it. After I naturally gave birth, I bawled my eyes out. I was in awe of the miracle of birth. The moment I saw my baby boy’s face was the moment I knew this was true love.

Q: I think you would agree that motherhood changes you…rewires your DNA and the process of birth is also a process of being reborn yourself. How has shifting into the role of mother restructured the essence of your life?

I truly believe the essence of my life didn’t begin until I became a mum. My baby became my number one priority. I knew we would have a special bond and we most certainly do. Far greater than anything I could have imagined. The love you feel for a child is indescribable. I love being a mum. My little man truly lights up my world.

To become the best mother I could be, I needed to shed my old way of living and step into a new version of myself.

After a big night out when Axel was 18 months old, I made the choice to quit alcohol. The thought of waking up with a hangover with a two-year-old that does not sit still for a minute gave me anxiety. Deep down, I knew I needed to leave my old life behind and focus my attention on my family and future.

Being alcohol-free my mind is clearer. I make better life choices. I eat better. I nourish my body and mind daily. My life simply flows better. I am more meaningful and have a natural high for life. Plus I am a more present, nurturing mother.

Q: Can you share with us your journey towards conscious parenting and how the power of presence impacts your daily life with your son?

Motherhood isn’t always easy. Just like life, there are ups and downs. I am a huge advocate of the conscious and positive parenting practices by Dr. Shefali (one of my greatest parenting mentors). Dr. Shefali has taught me to discuss empathy, respect and boundaries with my son. We discuss the need for releasing our emotions either by talking, drawing, painting, ect, so we don’t have to hold them inside. Furthermore, we talk about how unreleased anger, sadness, and pain can turn into sickness in his body. When we hit crossroads, we try to work out a solution together. If we are having an emotional day, we stop everything and move into nature. We go for a bike ride, jump on the trampoline, practice breathwork or do some yoga. We live by five basic principles; respect, honesty, love, kindness and caring. We practice mantras together. The Ho’oponopono mantra is one of my favorites to recite together “I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.” If there is anger, we shake it out. We also do a lot of deep breathing in sequences of 10. We repeat the mantra SO HUM, which is a Vedic mantra converting to “I Am That” or SAT NAM, “I Am Truth”. We practice gratitude. I ask him most days what and who he is grateful for.

Although I birthed Axel into the world, it is my belief that I do not own him. I am here to guide him, teach him emotional intelligence, show him connection and empathy. My job as his mother is not to control him to become what I want him to be. It is to give him space and guidance so he can become the human he wants to be.

I am very honest with Axel about life. I teach him that we all make mistakes and it’s ok to admit to making a mistake. I show him that it is ok to cry and show emotion as a full expression of the heart. I teach him the importance of self love.. We openly discuss what makes him happy and what does not. Quite often it is eating vegetables (haha), but we discuss why eating these foods are necessary for his growth, rather than telling him that he must eat them. I have found it best to explain things in great detail to him and allow him to ask questions. For him to understand, he needs to know why.

My son is my greatest teacher. He has taught me patience (and a lot of it), presence, gratitude, love and reminds me not to take life too seriously. He teaches me that I am a work in progress. I get angry. I yell. I overreact. But he is so gracious. He forgives easily. He loves unconditionally. He challenges and teaches me in ways that no adult ever couldn’t.

I have spent my adult life dealing with issues from my childhood so it’s imperative to me to teach Axel what I wish I learnt as a kid. Children just want to be heard, seen, valued, and have a sense of belonging. As we all do. So I feel it’s important to listen to what Axel needs and wants by empowering his choices.

Q: As a woman/mother, what UNSPOKEN SPACES of womanhood/motherhood do you think deserve more attention? Any idea on how to help transform the dialogue to better validate and honor our journeys?

I wish I had like-minded mothers around me when my son was born. During this time, I was so confused about what “type” of mother I was supposed to be and I didn’t trust my own wisdom. I needed to go in and trust my intuition and motherly instincts. Today, I feel there is more open dialogue around motherhood and groups to support women who desire to go deeper within themselves, finding the essence of who we are.

I feel the journey of motherhood starts with the mother. This is the time for women to heal our wounds so we don’t pass these onto our children. We are challenged to break through trauma bonds and unhealthy patterns of codependency and attachment. We start to do this by releasing our emotions, healing our inner child, breaking through patterns of fear, creating boundaries and by working through the core root of our triggers. These are the discussions I wish more mothers would have. I would love our feelings and emotions to be normalized. It’s ok not to be ok. Motherhood is a journey. A rollercoaster filled with blissful moments and trying times.

Q: How have you built community for yourself?

As my journey progresses, I find more and more like-minded women to connect with. I am constantly evolving. I need to find people who resonate with that journey I’m on in that particular moment. I tend to mix in many different circles, allowing for certain friends to align at different times. I feel the best way to find a community is to be the most authentic version of yourself first and then those meant for you will come.

Q: If you were speaking to a soon-to-be mama or someone on their fertility journey, what sage words of wisdom would you impart on her?

Listen to your intuition. Every Tom, Dick and Harry will try and give you advice on how to parent. Everyone thinks their way is the right way…but it’s not. No one knows your child as well as you do. Every child is different so not every “parenting style” works for all children. When people give advice, respectfully listen, but trust your intuition and find pieces of information that resonates with you. A mother’s intuition is spot on, trust it and trust yourself. Kids are here to teach us. To challenge us. So during hard times, ask yourself what lessons can be learnt. If something triggers you, do some shadow work to work out why. Question everything and do lots of research. Challenge what doesn’t resonate with you.

Q: Any go-to resources you’d like to share to inspire continued transformation?

Conscious Parenting by Dr. Shefali

The Holistic Psychologist on Instagram

The work of Jay Shetty, Deepak Chopra, Marianne Williamson, and Eckhart Tolle.

Join Our Seva Motherhood Circle

In the Our Seva Motherhood Circle private Facebook group, we explore how the transition into motherhood often comes with the birth of a whole new identity and set of life principles. As a collective, we open up transparent dialogue around how the efforts of parenting with heightened awareness allows women to connect to the deeper pulse guiding us all, our inner wisdom. If this conversation stirs something within you or your seeking community to explore what this means for you, I’d love for you to join us!

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Christine Anderson on Postpartum Care & Ayurveda For Modern Families

,Inner & Ancient Wisdom,Member Stories

Christine Anderson, mama, massage therapist, postpartum doula, and Our Seva Motherhood Circle community member shares how her personal awakening during her own sacred window (first 40 days post birth) stirred up her inner activist and propelled her down the path of caregiving for birthing families. Today, Christine is currently pursuing a certification in Ayurveda Postpartum care that will bolster her own personal transformation process and provide even more customized care to the families she serves. Enjoy! <3

Q: As someone dedicated to working with women/mothers and advocating for sustainable care practices, what inspired you to get into this line of work? Did your own path into motherhood have any influence?

When I began massage therapy school 10 years ago, I was so inspired when we began the prenatal massage segment. I cannot specifically put my finger on the one thing that was the big draw for me. Something about supporting birthing parents during their prenatal journey sounded and seemed like it could be so sacred and beautiful. I shared this dream with a friend and her response was, “You should look into becoming a doula.” At the time I don’t recall ever hearing the term doula. That simple, supportive statement really got the ball rolling for me.

In 2013 I learned I was pregnant with my daughter. JOY! After supporting families with massage therapy, I too would now get to experience the sacredness and beauty that I heard so many birthing parents talk about. We secured a birth doula, I maintained regular chiropractic and massage therapy appointments, participated in weekly prenatal yoga classes and stayed active. I was excited. I felt amazing, powerful and beautiful. I LOVED being pregnant. My birth experience wasn’t 100% my ideal scene, however I truly loved those 16.5 hours. I was able to find strength and motivation in developing a rhythm with our doula the moment she entered our home. I truly believe my birth experience would have been very different, and perhaps I’d be singing a different tune about my daughter’s birth. I felt so in love with my daughter, my partner and the beauty of my birth experience. I could not wait to get home and settle into motherhood.

Two days into “settling into motherhood,” I realized I felt so much more confident in my prenatal and birth periods than my postpartum period. It was as if I was drowning and there was no support around me. I wasn’t quite sure what to do with breastfeeding. I’m quite active, so resting and sleeping while baby slept didn’t even sound appealing. Why would I sleep when there are other things to be done around the house?

Everyone said I wouldn’t get sleep the first year of being a parent, so this routine of 2-3 hour naps for me was just something I needed to get used to. As I’m typing this, I just want to go back, reach out to my newly postpartum self, take the laundry out of my hands and say, “It’s ok to rest.”

It started to dawn on me that in my circle of friends, colleagues and birth professionals, there was little (if any) dialogue around postpartum support. I was sharing my experiences with a birth doula, and she said, “Maybe you should become a postpartum doula.” A what? What’s a postpartum doula? Why has this not come up in conversation from friends, family, colleagues, clients, even our midwife group until now? Why don’t more families know about this type of support? I felt the same drive to learn more and add another layer of support for birthing families in the community. I enrolled in a postpartum doula training the next month, and began working with families through a local birth and postpartum support organization. It’s been inspiring to hear and feel the energy bubbling in our community surrounding postpartum support. This energy is fueling my fire and my work and offerings are only just beginning.

Q: You’ve recently embarked on a journey to become a certified Ayurvedic Postpartum Doula. Can you share what sparked your interest in Ayurveda and how you believe this ancient wisdom can become an ally for women on the path to motherhood?

Somewhere in middle school I first learned about yoga and Ayurveda through an article in SEVENTEEN magazine. Four flashcards with yoga poses were conveniently perforated, and I was always up for something new. Perhaps following the instructions in the magazine, I would turn the lights low, light a candle and explore these things called “yoga poses.” Looking back it seems like an unlikely initial introduction to both, however the tear-out flashcards showcasing four yoga poses stayed tucked in my journals for years. I didn’t have friends or family interested in Ayurveda, so I tucked curiosities away with the flashcards. It wasn’t until I returned to yoga after my collegiate athletics career that I allowed my interest in Ayurveda to resurface.

My desire to begin the training was two fold. I have been exploring opportunities to learn more about Ayurveda for my own personal support over the years, and blending this desire with learning postpartum support practices seemed like a perfect fit. Ayurvedic practices and concepts can help lay out the framework for a beautifully personalized and healing Sacred Window for all birthing parents. It’s through personal exploration that I’m learning how to nurture myself more through Ayurveda.

One of the challenges I faced when first beginning this journey was a fear I would have to completely shift how I eat, breath and live in order to fully experience the gifts Ayurveda has to offer. What relief to learn I was wrong!

I was gently encouraged to begin by focusing on one or two concepts that resonated with me. From there, I was able to add an additional practice or idea when I felt called. It truly is an individualized learning experience, which is reflective to how personalized postpartum support can be through the optic of Ayurveda.

Q: As women and mothers, there are many unsupportive cultural narratives that create tension and clouded perspectives when it comes to confidently forging our own paths. What “unspoken spaces” of personal transformation do you feel need more attention or a gentle rewriting?

One of the best gifts we can offer others is a supportive space to be heard. Our current society seems to be holding tightly to the concept of, “Hurry up and have your baby so you can get back to work.” During our brief postpartum periods, pressures surrounding bedtime routines, breastfeeding and acting as if we have it all together are all too real! No wonder postpartum depression rates are so alarmingly high in our nation. My heart strings are pulled every time a birthing parent apologizes for “breaking down” and letting the emotional layers of parenthood pour from their heart. Our emotional challenges are not separate from our physical being. I believe realigning our priorities surrounding postpartum care to include more open spaces supporting our vulnerabilities is imperative to our personal and collective healing as birthing parents.

Q: The most direct way we can care for our communities is to place importance on caring for ourselves. In regards to inner wisdom – what does it sound like for you and how do you access it?

Answer: Inner wisdom is the voice inside of me offering gentle whispers of love, guidance and support. She is a blend of my ancestors, the Spirit of the Universe and personal experiences. Somewhere in my early stages of motherhood, I felt some of my walls begin to crumble, and I began to love and embrace my Inner Wisdom more. When I am not ready to listen to her (which for me tends to be fear getting in the way), she has no problem raising her voice or presenting learning opportunities. I’ll eventually hear the message, which is typically softer the first time around.

This concept of tuning into our Inner Wisdom circles back to offering spaces for folks to be heard. If I am not pausing to connect with my Inner Wisdom, then I am choosing to be distracted and often dilute her messages.

Look around us. We are seeing this everywhere right now. To be honest, we’ve been seeing and hearing this for years. Our nation’s Inner Wisdom is suffocating, which is why everything feels so loud right now. Her gentle whispers were not enough. If the noise is getting to you, turn inward and allow the volume to turn down. Your Inner Voice is waiting for you.

Q: If you only had 5 minutes to pause and find that steadiness within, how would you spend that time? Is there a way you can ensure this practice in pausing is sustainable and routine?

Breathwork. It is the most easily accessible form of support for me. If I am able, standing outside barefoot while focusing on my breath can feel incredibly stabilizing. If I am inside or wearing shoes, I visualize my roots digging down deep into Mother Earth, intertwining with other roots from the most majestic, nurturing trees my mind can create.

Q: Any go-to resources you’d like to share to inspire continued personal transformation or connection to our omnipresent wisdom within?

Beautiful Chorus has been my musical savior the past six months. Their music is authentic, divine and pure love. I often hear their music and mantras pass through my awareness exactly when I need them to.

Join Our Seva Motherhood Circle

In the Our Seva Motherhood Circle private Facebook group, we explore what caregiving looks like through all stages of motherhood, including the sacred role of our own personal caregivers (birth & postpartum doulas). As a community, we focus our efforts on awakening the wisdom within, finding a beautiful melding of our inner authorities and the ancient wisdom that guides women so intuitively. If this conversation stirs something within you, I’d love for you to join us!

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Monica Shepherd on Plant Wisdom & Empowering the Divine Feminine

,Inner & Ancient Wisdom,Member Stories

Monica Shepherd, Naturopath, women’s health advocate, and Our Seva Motherhood Circle community member has been called to work with women and bring us back to a state of bliss and internal balance through food, mental health advocacy, and the empowering the divine feminine within. I hope you enjoy Monica’s perspective on plant to human communication and her suggestions for finding sacredness within the mundane. <3

Q: Welcome, Monica! You and I both share a passion for connecting within the vulnerability of motherhood and womanhood – Can you share a little bit about how you started working with women, guiding us back to ourselves?

Absolutely! Going on my own journey and seeing other women share similar experiences, the empath in me felt a calling and responsibility to see women thrive and shine. I want to see women happy and successful. It has always been a key focus of mine to teach women simple hacks for getting their mental and physical health in top notch. It should be easy, what if it was all easy?

We are led to believe that life must be hard for women.
No, women are tough but let it be easy for us.

Q: One thing that I have always loved about your transformation and guidance is your eagerness to dive into the less common, “unspoken spaces” of womanhood – When it comes to the personal transformation process, what “unspoken spaces” do you feel deserve more attention & how can we make small steps to shift the cultural narrative?

An unspoken space I still see is the discomfort many of us have when talking about women’s bodies in context of menstrual blood and pleasure, not necessarily together. There are still the Madonna and Mary versions of women portrayed, where to talk about a woman experiencing pleasure, but not necessarily about women deserving pleasure. The mother and wife still deserve pleasure. We women must accept, feel comfort, and talk as we make choices about our body’s functions and feelings. This is a turn in history where more research is being done by females on the female body. With social media more women are openly expressing themselves in ways that feel right to them. Women can be all the archetypes in one, the maiden and the mother. Mothers are still exceptionally beautiful… just because.

Q: As a naturopath, I assume you believe in the colliding of inner and ancient wisdom as powerful tools for self-care and self discovery – How do you use the ancient wisdom of nature and natural rhythms to find steadiness within?

It is an emotional connection with nature that research suggests is the most profound. However, what I find particularly profound is how nature communicates with us. We are quite literally made up of trillions of bacteria that are acting as guests. We accommodate these guests by becoming reliant on them, hence the microbiome. We have a similar relationship with plants that was developed by our ancestors’ reliance on foraging for food. We have developed receptors throughout our body that need bitter components of herbs for example but it is deeper than that.

We are observing the way plants can communicate with each other in research and have found, for example, that when a cow in a paddock eats a particular plant continually over a period of time, the plant will change to make itself taste less appealing. It doesn’t stop there, the plants around it will also change. Understanding then what happens when these plant molecules are kept intact (and keep in mind many herbal medicine and essential oil companies remove molecules for mass production) is what we are still learning about.

But one thing is clear, using plants as medicine is powerful and that has been what I have witnessed as a naturopath on numerous occasions. It is my aim to impart this abundance of knowledge to everyone, and to bring back the medicine woman. I might have a complementary medicine degree but I really just want to see women using this medicine in their everyday lives.

Q: As a mother, have you established a consistent “tuning in” practice that allows you to settle into the sacredness of the mundane or find purpose in the pause? Share your secrets!

Yes, it is in the daily and weekly routines that we have made sacred. Nature time everyday, but more so on weekends. Meditation every night… These moments make our lives sacred. The key is to weave in quality time amongst the bust aspects of life.

Q: These have been very interesting and challenging times for the collective – what have you discovered about yourself as a woman and that of mother, that you didn’t realize pre-pandemic?

These challenging times have been a blessed time of growth and refinement for me. It’s been a great reminder of how the simplicity can be profound.

I have had time to tell my daughter stories of when I was a child and that nourished her. I have refined so much of what I do in my home and in my business, coming out more organized and with more clarity.

We often think we are doing all the right things that will take us where we want and need to do. A regular brain dump and forced rest are essential. Something I’m experimenting with is keeping new creative projects to a minimum during my period.

Q: Community is such a huge piece of the process as we become who we are becoming – How has community influenced your transformation process and where is the most unexpected place you’ve found rallying support?

What I have learned having lived in different communities all throughout Australia is that it doesn’t matter where you go in the country or the world, there are always beautiful people and people who will help you. Remember there are good trustworthy people surrounding you.

Q: Any resources (books, podcasts, groups, articles) you think are must see/reads?

Womb Awakening by Azra Bertrand is a must read.

Join Our Seva Motherhood Circle

Whether navigating personal transformation as a maiden or mother, the beauty of the journey is found by listening deeply to our heart’s desires and taking intuitive action. As a collective, the Our Seva Motherhood Circle private Facebook group is on a mission to help shift the cultural narrative around the unspoken spaces, no matter what stage you find yourself in. We focus our efforts with weekly themed discussions around shifting identities, inner and ancient wisdom, mental health, cultural narratives, and our sacred service to motherhood/womanhood. I’d love it if you would join us!

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Eva Maria Smith on Loving Awareness, Intuitive Self Care and Motherhood

,Identity & Transformation,Inner & Ancient Wisdom,Member Stories

Eva Maria Smith, soulful mama of two, writer and Our Seva Motherhood Circle community member takes us down the path of contemplative motherhood through anecdotes of surrendering, grounding and returning to loving awareness in all that we do. The way Eva shares her transformation process offers a welcomed perspective on grace and ease, inspires intuitive action, and honors those simple strategies for tuning into to the wisdom within. I hope Eva’s interview anchors you into the present moment…because there is no better place to be <3

Q: You’re writing a book – How exciting! There is so much to talk about here, but what are you writing about and how has the writing process been a practice of “unraveling” and returning to the wisdom within?

Oh, writing this book, just like motherhood itself has been the best of days and the worst of days. I’m continuously traveling to the perimeters of what I thought I was capable of – both raveling in loving awareness within my own creativity and facing the devil that is resistance. I am learning to be patient and forgiving with myself in this process, another parallel to mothering.

In essence the book is about how we actually live this mothering experience, this human experience. Am I awake? Am I aware? Am I rooted in joy? Am I truly alive in this existence? I am exploring how the journey of motherhood can be a more peaceful one, for myself and for the reader. Explorations on how I can step out of fatigue and arrive at contentment.

It will be short essays of memoiric musings, but also inspiration and practical advice on well-being in motherhood. Some pieces are more philosophical, while others provide meditation, ritual and useful guidance. Truthfully, it is the piece I needed to read a few years ago, when I found myself lonely, depleted and caught in negative thoughts after I had my second child. I drew from inspiring mothers around me and on the internet and let their bright light spark the torch that led me through to the other side. In truth, this book is about me trying to pass on this light to others.

As a mother, this idea of finding stillness amongst the chaos feels like a moment-by-moment challenge. It’s a spiritual practice of sorts, right? Do you have any practical tips for settling the mind, hopefully allowing you to squeeze the nectar of life available to us within the mundane?

It truly is a moment-by-moment challenge. It also feels like balancing an advanced yoga pose, just when I think I got it, I lose my balance. Stillness is the most difficult and most rewarding thing to master. To settle my mind, I ground my feet. When I feel into the soles of my feet and bring awareness to the connectedness to mother earth, the upward current of energy revitalizes me. It only takes a moment to root, but when I do connect the energy of my body through the feet with the earth I am tapping into an infinite supply of lively, paradisiacal energy.

In my book I write
“…, isn’t motherhood itself aerial? These beautiful, ethereal beings are born through us from the heavens, causing us to swirl in a vortex of emotions ranging from the highest exhilaration to the utmost despair and leaving us like leaves drifting in the winds, sometimes gliding at ease and sometimes spinning in the storms. Nothing is ever certain in child raising. Everything is up in the air. So isn’t putting our feet on the ground, letting our energetic roots sink down and get anchored and affirmed by mother earth the sweetest equilibrium we can feel?”

To build on the last question – For you, what does it mean to be embodied in full presence? As a mother, have you found your child to be the greatest teacher of presence?

As an adult I often don’t even notice when I have completely stepped out of presence. I’m constantly “in my head”, which is really just the feeling of being in constant thought, right? Most of our thoughts are about the past or the future, neither of which we can control. That is why it is so emotionally draining and even physically exerting to be in constant thinking mode. Often it takes a shift in the energy in the house for me to realize that I’ve lost my embodiment of the present moment. I ask myself “why are the kids so wild all of a sudden?” or “what is it with the whining and screaming?”, but really it is them reflecting the swirl of madness going on in my head. It takes me to calm my mind first, so we can all float back into calmer waters. The lesson is to be in the flow with them, rather than getting crushed by the waves in my head. When I am embodied in full presence, my mind is a calm sea, my body is light and afloat, my soul is free of suffering.

As transforming women, we often live within the spaces of who we are and who we are becoming. This “in between” state brings about a lot of agitation, fear of the unknown, and distrust of the natural unfolding of things. How has your personal practice allowed you to settle into the unknown with more ease?

Oh yes, this “in between” is quite unnerving. It all comes down to trust. I trust that life is inherently good. I trust that life is here to support me. I trust that the impermanence of life works out in my favor. I trust that if I put in the work, if I keep watering and tending to my inner garden, my soul will start to bloom. Personally, meditation helped me a lot to regain this trust. I’ve become a vedic meditator last year and my twice a day practice has caused a huge shift for me.

Three ways to nourish your mind, body and soul if you only have 5 minutes…go!

A glass of water! I have to constantly remind myself to drink clear, filtered, replenishing water, but my body will immediately punish me with irritability, loss of energy and tiredness if I don’t. I have finally realized the power that is in a glass of water for me.

A few pages of a good book! It took me a few years after becoming a mother to identify this sense of “missing” in my life until I realized I had missed heart-filling books. I’ve neglected making time to read and if I did I only read about birth and child-raising. As a mother I reframed how I read books. I’m not so stringent anymore. I allow myself to stop reading a book, if I don’t enjoy it rather than powering through to the end and I usually have a non-fiction, an easy read and a beautiful coffee table book ready to go. 5 minutes of reading, or even flicking through a cookbook is tremendously inspiring and nourishing for my soul. It also helps me overcome that mind-numbing sensation of only answering toddler questions, which are enriching and curiosity driven for sure, but honestly can be draining over time, when you are the only adult in the house all day long.

Pranayama! Five minutes is more than enough to calm the mind and body with some intentional breathing exercise. I love breathing in imaginary white and yellow rays of light and let it circle it through my whole body on the exhale. It is an instant mood booster.

Any go-to resources you’d like to share to inspire continued personal transformation for those on the path of motherhood?

Lately, I have really enjoyed following the works of Miriam Adler (@miriamadler) and the healing exercises she has provided for free during COVID. Laura Poole (@laura_poole) and Natalie Martinot (@spacetoflow) have first inspired me on my meditation journey, which I’m grateful for. Lastly, I humbly want to mention to keep following along with me (@eva.maria.smith) as I continue to write and work on the release of my first book, which I hope will be a great inspiration for many.

Part 1: Birthing Babies, Yourself and Creative Projects with Eva-Maria Smith

Part 2: 5 Minute Sacral Meditation for The Art of Mothering

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In the Our Seva Motherhood Circle private Facebook group, we support one another as women and mothers in the midst of really important work; returning home to our sacred centers. We are on a mission to help shift the cultural narrative around the unspoken spaces of motherhood and womanhood, no matter what stage you find yourself in. We focus our efforts with weekly themed discussions around shifting identities, inner and ancient wisdom, mental health, cultural narratives, and our sacred service to motherhood/womanhood. I’d love it if you would join us!

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Elisa Moga on Conscious Movement, Purposeful Pause & Inner Wisdom

,Identity & Transformation,Inner & Ancient Wisdom,Member Stories

Elisa Moga, creator behind Moga Yoga Art, eloquently shares her perspective what it means to connect with the wisdom within. For maiden or mother, Elisa provides comforting reassurance no matter where you are on the the path of personal transformation, acknowledging there are many routes to self-realization and personal practices that can be customized to your own experience. I personally love her approach to striving for balance, and the simplicity in her sustainable self care suggestions. I hope Elisa’s interview inspires you to reconnect with the ever-present wisdom within, honoring it for what it is and the continual support it offers. <3

Q: I’ve been so inspired by your approach for connecting women to their inner wisdom. Can you share a little bit about what you do and how you poetically weave together movement, photography and wise words to reconnect women with their inner voices?

First of all, I really appreciate the way you announce my approach ‘weaving’ sounds very right within myself so thank you for this.

I would say that all these different medias come from the same intention to rise, to express myself in a way that feels right, aligned and unique. Through the creative process, self-care and acceptance is essential, yet challenging. This inner voice is already here, waiting for us to take time to sit still, listen deeper than the fears, to a place deeper than the comparison and the judgmental thoughts. All these practices permit me to be fully present with myself and the divine energy (the feminine power); focused and open to what needs to come through me.

I would love every woman to welcome this voice, this power; to feel legitimate of being a source of inspiration for the world.

I simply share my journey with the most authentic and joyful voice I can make space for, so women can be inspired to do the same – because each of them are worth it – I do all of this through Yoga classes, retreats and workshops (in France and soon in Europe), poetry, photography and movement!

Q: The flow of movement in yoga can be seen as a parallel between the movement of the body and the movement of the natural working of the world around us. Would you like to share how moving the body (or the absence of movement) can act as a practice for emotional and spiritual awareness?

I love that question! In Yoga and in many other animist philosophies, a strong belief says that the world is around and within us – the Nature around us reflects our internal landscape and vice versa. Everything is One. Also, the body is considered as the link between these two spaces. So, whenever you move the physical body, you then activate an energy that goes way beyond the Human condition. Through movement we can create, we can build, we can release. Spiritual awareness starts with stillness – free from heavy and disturbing thoughts, we can see this peaceful emptiness, this silence that nourishes our spiritual Self. We are one. All these bodies as One, as Us, as divine.

In regards to emotions, we can release the stuck energies in the body parts (often the lower back, the hips, neck or stomach) that need the most release to feel lighter, more open, more grounded, and present. This state of ‘flow’ we can experiment with through Yoga or any creative practice and it is a wonderful and intense moment where nothing is more important than what and who you are.

In Yoga, we observe, we recognize our feelings, our sensations (either physical, emotional, mental…) in a sacred space.

Our practice is spiritual if we allow ourselves to try, to learn, to discover what makes us so special, so unique and yet universal. It is about letting go the preconceived ideas, the limiting beliefs of what is real, what is good or not, and to simply be with yourself, here and now.

Furthermore, I would say that movement and stillness are two faces of the same concept – energy. There is movement through stillness, and stillness through movement.

Q: We are living in a time of sensory overload – Any tips for quieting the mind in an effort to return to your sacred center within?

Oh yes, it is very needed and freeing to do so. First of all, we must remind ourselves that the mind hates silence because it thinks it is emptiness and nothingness, so we must be very kind and patient with ourselves when we are unable to quiet the mind.

Awareness of breath is my go-to tool for sensory overload. Either standing in the subway, sitting in the garden, or laying on my bed, I usually put one hand on my belly and the other on my chest. I observe the quality of my thoughts, of my breath and the sensations I feel in that moment (might be stress, anxiety, fatigue). Then, I practice this little exercise that helps me a lot – breath after breath, I try to equalize the inhales with exhales. If I inhale for 4 counts (without pushing the breath, just naturally inhaling with the belly), then I exhale for 4 counts. It takes a moment to find the rhythm. I keep my attention and my awareness in the practice as long as I need to feel quiet and at peace. Actually, meditation starts with concentration. Here is the first step. Try it out and let me know how you feel!

Q: Ancient wisdom and the principles of Ayurveda place high importance on understanding your body’s natural homeostasis or internal balance. From a yogic perspective, what does striving for balance look like?

According to many indigenous peoples (like the Lakotas or the Massai), the balance is a concept that, by definition, is never achieved. For example, whenever you change something in your food, you then change the entire system that once led you to balance before. Because of this, it is permanent work and an awareness practice.

From a yogic perspective, discipline is a key element for balancing our lives. Daily commitment to what makes us feel good and aligned – the asanas (the physical practice), the pranayams (the breathing exercises), the meditation and concentration. These times allow our cortisol levels to drop down considerably. All of this is part of the “striving” you mentioned.

At this point of my journey, I am able to surrender into a more peaceful and natural state, without straining myself too hard or with strict rules. For example, I changed a lot of my asana (movement) practice to something way more flowing, more like free dancing. In regards to food, I also do not put any tag on my forehead and listen more with my intuition for what suits my body.

And one major point I would love to share, specifically from a woman to another woman, is that balance is unique and not repeatable! So many magazines, ‘experts’ and teachers promote their super-wise programs to make us fit their own visions of what balance and beauty is. However, the only expert of yourself is you! It is this inner voice that expects your respect and attention. Balance is moving, balance is individual.

Q: As a mother, I’m always seeking new ways to fortify sustainable self-reflection and care practices – If you only had 5 minutes to pause and find that steadiness within, how would you spend that time?

Bare feet on the grass. Hands looking towards the sky. Still, yet in connection with Mother Earth and the elements. Breathing. Being.

Q: Any go-to resources you’d like to share to inspire continued personal transformation or connection to our omnipresent wisdom within?

I personally find books and poetry powerful to transform and transcend. Krishnamurti, Frédéric Lenoir for the spiritual/philosophical aspect. Khalil Gibran and Rupi Kaur for the poetic element.

Journaling is a limitless source of inner wisdom – writing from your personal source!

I would also recommend my dear friend Lora’s instagram, for daily inspiring imagery & words.

Also, the very well-made and complete website for sustainable living, The Good Trade.

And finally, to listen without moderation, the brilliant podcast ‘Mind Love’ created by Melissa Monte! It’s a daily go-to resource for acceptance, self-love and connection.

In this video, Elisa gently guides us through a 5-minute movement practice that nourishes your mind, body and soul through intuitive, free flowing movement.

Join Our Seva Motherhood Circle

In the Our Seva Motherhood Circle private Facebook group, we support one another as we navigate back to our heart’s true designs by following the guidance from our inner wisdom. As a community of women, we are on a mission to help shift the cultural narrative around the unspoken spaces of motherhood and womanhood, no matter what stage you find yourself in. We focus our efforts with weekly themed discussions around shifting identities, inner and ancient wisdom, mental health, cultural narratives, and our sacred service to motherhood/womanhood. I’d love it if you would join us!

Join the Private Facebook Group →

Want to contribute your story?
Email hello@our-seva.com with “member story” in the subject line and tell us a little bit about how you’d like to share! The question we ask all guests is “What UNSPOKEN SPACES of womanhood/motherhood do you think deserve more attention?”

Dani Escobar on Heart-Centered Wellness & Devotional Practices

,Inner & Ancient Wisdom,Member Stories

Dani Escobar, Ayurvedic women’s health practitioner, Ayurvedic postpartum doula, herbalist and Our Seva Motherhood Circle community member understands the subtleties that allow women and mothers to feel nourished during their most transformative years. With the ability to tune into the natural rhythms of nature and modern life, Dani shares a variety of potential practices to try as you return home to your sacred center. I’m hope you’re inspired by Dani’s heart-centered approach to women’s wellness <3

Q: In my humble opinion, there is no better combination than that of mother care and the ancient wisdom of Ayurveda — Can you share how you arrived at your certification as Ayurvedic Practitioner, and how that evolved to be in support of women and mothers?

My Ayurvedic journey began in Mysore, India, 2011, where I met my dear yoga teacher Sri. V Sheshadri, with whom I practiced and studied the science of Yoga continuously every year for two to three months. He introduced me to some Ayurvedic herbs, and he saw my interest in this divine science and my sincere intention to be of service. He was the one who encouraged me to start my studies at the Mysore Ayurveda Academy.

In my self-healing journey, I was able to improve my digestion, slowly regulate my hormones, and gently heal emotional wounds that I have been carrying from my maternal line. This is a journey that I am still today, and Ayurveda and Yoga have shown me a beautiful path to nature and to love.

As I continued to experience the healing benefits of Ayurveda, I had a deep desire in my heart to share it and be of service.

I believe that women require deep nourishment, and they are craving connection and sacred space.

This has led me to deepen my studies in women’s health and offer a sacred space to support women on their journey back to nature.

Later on, I met a beautiful Ayurvedic Doctor in Pune, India, specialized in women’s health with whom I did my mentorship and masters study in Ayurvedic gynecology and obstetrics.

Q: For someone who is completely new to the ancient wisdom of Ayurveda, how would you describe the essence of the sometimes esoteric principle and practices?

Ayurveda is the science of life that offers us the tools to live in harmony with nature, our environment, our loved ones… with all of life!

Q: Tuning in to our internal balances and prioritizing daily self observation are important aspects of Ayurvedic protocols — Have you established any intuitive “tuning in” practices that have helped you align with the natural rhythms of the day/seasons?

Ayurveda is all about awareness. We are bringing our awareness to our day to day and deep self-observation. As we know, the elements are dancing in the environment and continually changing. Ayurveda teaches us to be sensitive to our environment.

The practices that have helped me align with the natural rhythms of the day and seasons are the daily rituals (dinacharya) that Ayurveda suggests and the three pillars of health and well-being.

There is so much beauty in creating a daily sadhana (spiritual practice) and daily ritual to nourish and cleanse the senses and to bring clarity and stillness into the mind.

My daily rituals or routines that I have been practicing for a few years are:
Waking up before sunrise 4:45 am > brushing teeth & tongue scraping > the practice of abhyanga + gandusha (oil pulling) > warm shower > nasya > pranayama, meditation, yoga asanas > nourishing breakfast > work > nourishing lunch > work > soup for dinner > shower + tongue scraping/brushing teeth > prayers/mantras > sleep by 9:30

These practices allow nature to be without us needing to change or disturbed it. We are amplifying nature’s wisdom and divine energy by following practices that connect us with sattva (energy of clarity, purity, awareness, love).

Q: What would you say to a new mama or anyone new to Ayurveda who feels these practices are out of reach, unsustainable or overwhelming? How can we reassure them that it’s a “take what feels good, leave the rest” approach?

First, I will tell mama that these are practices that have to be enjoyed, and their intention is not to be overwhelming but instead nourishing. If they are out of reach, we can always modify and adjust to whatever we can do on that day. But, most importantly, to remember that everything is a form of the divine, and when a mom gives birth to her baby, her dharma is to take care of and nourish her baby in loving service.

The act of surrendering to what is and the practice of seeing the divine in all situations is a very deep sadhana –
a meditation practice.

In the Bhagavad, Gita Krishna tells Arjuna, “Karma Yoga is discretion in action (skill in action), making a dharmic choice a Karma yogi is endowed with sameness of mind (the same in the presence of pleasure and pain) and gives up being motivated by the fruits of action.”

When we practice loving presence and awareness, we are building ojas, our immunity and vitality. I would tell a mama that the work that she is doing now is her current sadhana. It is her spiritual practice that can nourish her heart and all the cells of her body.

Q: I would love to hear your thoughts on the Ayurvedic perspective of the first 40 days postpartum and the depth of sacredness that can be experienced between the thinned veil of maiden and mother!

The 40 days after childbirth are so special in a mother’s life!

Nature offers to the mother this time for her to rejuvenate all of her tissues. Imagine how incredible and essential it is. This sacred time is an opportunity for the mother to enhance her health and wellbeing for the years to come. It is such a unique and beautiful time that I profoundly believe that should be embraced with love, support, and nourishment.

The sacred window is a time for mom to bond with her baby and experience the pure love and deep connection. Throughout this time, both mother and baby are so sensitive! And both mom and baby need to feel loved, supported, warm, and cozy.

I believe that when the mother feels nourished and supported throughout this time, she can continually offer her highest self to her baby without depletion. But instead with awareness, patience, and fully connected to her intuition.

Q: Does Ayurveda offer any wisdom to the subtleties that are happening during this time – Maybe from the intuitive or spiritual side of things?

In Yoga and Ayurveda, it is believed that three energies hold the Universe.

Creation, sustenance, and destruction – These energies are always present in our lives. Even in our bodies, the cells are created, sustained, and then destroyed. I believe that there is a higher intelligence that is trying to bring back nature to a balanced state. There has been so much abuse to mother nature, to animals, to the environment, to human beings that something needs to happen for a change to occur. I believe this is a time when nature is allowing us the space to reflect so we can create higher awareness, and hopefully, we can start to choose love in our day.

Q: In an ideal world, we’d move through our days with dedication to senses, infusing all the lovely Ayurvedic protocols. As mothers, I know many women feel these practices are no longer accessible while juggling little ones. If you could only do one thing in the morning and one thing in the evenings, where would you invest your time?

In the mornings, some type of body movement (yoga, low impact exercise, run, dance, etc.) will move prana and allow the lymphatic system and blood to purify. It will also help with the mind and emotions.

In the evening, abhyanga with gentleness and love.

And I would add to bring awareness to our day-to-day so the day can be our meditation, prayer, and sadhana.

Q: As modern women, it’s quite challenging to find stillness and time for reflection during the day — If you only had 5 minutes to indulge all 5 of your senses, what would you do?

Drink gently and with gratitude a warm cup of spicy chai 🙂

Q: Any go-to resources you’d like to share to inspire continued personal transformation or connection to our omnipresent wisdom within?

Yes!! www.ayurveda.com, My teacher Dr. Vasant Lad offers many educational videos with so much divine wisdom on Ayurveda, spirituality, pranayama, and so much more! He is just pure love!

In this video, Dani walks us through some of the essential elements to a well-balance dinacharya, or daily self-care ritual. Although this approach follows ancient Ayurvedic protocols, the recommended approach is experiment and then implement those practices that feel deeply nourishing. This is not an “all or nothing” approach to wellness, but rather a heart-centered approach that is guided by intuition.

Join Our Seva Motherhood Circle

In the Our Seva Motherhood Circle private Facebook group, we support one another as women and mothers who are learning to tap into the inner wisdom always at our disposal. We are on a mission to embody the divinity in everything we do, from the creative projects we resurrect to the children we raise. As a collective, we focus our efforts with weekly themed discussions around shifting identities, inner and ancient wisdom, mental health, cultural narratives, and our sacred service to motherhood/womanhood. I’d love it if you would join us!

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Mel Goode on Finding Community & Veering Off The Beaten Path

,Identity & Transformation,Inner & Ancient Wisdom,Member Stories

As a mother to teenage girls and a yogi at heart, Mel Goode has spent her transformative path through motherhood, veering off the beaten path to find full resonance. Allowing her inner wisdom to guide her in taking the next intuitive step forward, Mel has found community in unexpected places, sifted through the collective noise around spirituality, and found the grounding pulse of motherhood through the use of breath work and a good book. I hope Mels’s story ignites a reconnection to your inner voice and inspires intuitive action.<3

Where are you on the path of motherhood – preconception, pregnancy, postpartum (less than 1 year) or forever postpartum (1+ year)? Forever Postpartum (I have a 13 year old and a 12 year old)

Can you tell us about your transformative path to motherhood?

I was very much so an only child that loved to spend time with her friends and the whole world revolved around me. I didn’t seem to care much about the future or past and was living in the moment…my moment. Choosing to pass on college, I had a full time job and had done well to work myself up in my career.

Once I met my husband and we got pregnant, it felt like I completely changed my life values. While pregnant, I worked until the moment I gave birth and intended to go back to work full time after the baby arrived. Once I met her, that whole idea shifted and my husband worked 2 jobs to let me be a stay-at-home mom. Man was that a tough shift!

It took me almost two years to adjust to the new role as “mother” and the identity I had made for myself (that was based on my job and friends) was also shifting.

I had to recreate myself and figure out my true priorities. At the time, these were healthily eating habits (which only meant homemade food), family time, fitness, nature, and spiritual journey… which led me to the most healing modalities so far, yoga.

You mentioned spiritual journey as part of your transformative path – What about motherhood shifting things (spiritually) for you in those early years?

I was raised by parents who incorporated Episcopal Church into my childhood because they both came from different faiths and decided to try something in between for our family. Nothing ever resonated or felt at peace for me and created a feeling of stress each time I would go.

As an adult, my husband and I tried many different styles of churches and always ended up discouraged because the whole “mega church” that was the predominant option in our town, left me feeling overwhelmed, disconnected, out of place, and judged.

After years of trying to fit into something that never felt right, yoga actually led us to try different styles of churches, meditation places, and exposing the kids to different faiths and styles of worship that were not all Christian based. I hope this has helped open my children up to be more accepting and more confident in finding their own path.

As a woman/mother, what UNSPOKEN SPACES of womanhood/motherhood do you think deserve more attention? Any idea on how to help transform the dialogue to better validate and honor our journeys?

– The different role you begin to play in your marriage, as a friend, or to your parents/siblings.

– Another would be the unrecognized “work” our stay-at-home moms do and the disconnection you feel from the world and your husband when you are the stay-at-home mom. At times, it feels as though everything that involves your partner’s job, money, or self is more important than family and real connection. It’s really hard to find time for yourself and your partner. By the time my husband gets home from work, all we ever have time to do is eat and watch a show and then repeat. There is no “you” outside of parenting.

– Some more would be all the different types of parenting styles…breastfeeding preferences…co-sleeping or no co-sleeping… All paths seem so taboo in America.

There is a lot of pressure on moms who choose to veer off the beaten path, leaving us feeling less successful at our efforts.

The list could go on forever, right? – If our culture could shift just ONE thing in regards to validating and honoring our mothers…what one thing do you think would make the biggest impact?

Creating a program for new mothers that involves counseling, mentoring, or support systems: resources in hospitals or community centers.

How have you built community for yourself?

My community is found in yoga and like-minded parents I’ve come across. I’m pretty Introverted but have always had a lot of friends. As I aged and found myself frequently moving locations, making connections became harder. I become less interested in building those connections and am pretty content just reading a book or having lunch with a friend.

As a fellow introvert, I know community can be one of the hardest things to piece together – What would you consider a “safe space” and how does that factor into how you choose your community?

Something like the Our Seva community you have created for us or other online/in person help groups. Luckily, I’ve found these groups for motherhood, thyroid issues, exercise and nutrition, spiritual centers, and breast implant disease. These are the places where other people face the same challenges and we can share ideas and create an environment that supports one another.

If you were speaking to a soon-to-be mama or someone on their fertility journey, what sage words of wisdom would you impart on her?

– Don’t forget to take care of your own personal self care needs and try not to have guilt in regard to dedicating this time, because when you are overwhelmed and overworked the whole family suffers.

– Make time to go to counseling before you have kids, ensuring your ideals line up. At the first sign of trouble, seek out an expert.

– Don’t lose your identity and become the maid or roommate.

– Planning and routines are really helpful as well as consistently and boundaries.

– Don’t just buy your children’s happiness.

– Teach your children empathy/compassion and let them make their own meals and choices when they are capable of doing so. This builds a healthy relationship with self and food.

Mothers are so limited on “me time” – If you only had 10 minutes, what activity would you do to help ground yourself into the present moment?

Breath work – using a 10 second inhale followed by a 10 second exhale. Or maybe I would step outside and do something in the yard, some simple yoga sun salutations, or read from an uplifting book.

Any go-to resources you’d like to share to inspire continued transformation?

Raising Baby Green, By Alan Greene

Yoga & The Quest For Self, By Stephen Cope

Obstacle In The Way, By Ryan Holiday

Others: mindful parenting books, spiritual books on various faiths and religion (so they are aware of other cultures and beliefs), retreats or trips by yourself or with spouse, visiting spiritual places that have a strong sense of community, and surrounding yourself with elders/friends.

Join Our Seva Motherhood Circle

In the Our Seva Motherhood Circle private Facebook group, we support one another as we veer off the beaten path, finding our own steady rhythms to motherhood. As a community of women, we are on a mission to help shift the cultural narrative around the unspoken spaces of motherhood…no matter what stage you find yourself in. We show up to share from a place of vulnerability, know that our stories give one another the language needed to really stir things up. We focus our efforts with weekly themed discussions around shifting identity, maternal mental health, cultural expectations and our sacred service to motherhood. I’d love it if you join us!

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Jodi Rogers on Grounding Practices to Navigate Anxiety

,Infertility,Maternal Mental Health,Member Stories

Jodi Sky Rogers is a Fertility Support Coach, Author and Our Seva Motherhood Circle community member. Her personal experience with PCOS, fertility challenges and pregnancy loss over the past seven years inspires her to support women going through similar experiences. She is passionate about creating soulful fertility, mindfulness and trying-to-conceive self care resources and tools to support women on their fertility journey. She recently published a new Kindle book, called Daily Cup of Fertility Calm, a 14-day tea meditation devotional for anxiety relief during the “two week wait”, which is often a stressful time for women who are trying to conceive. Please welcome Jodi as she shares her intimate story navigating the daily anxieties that often accompany the path towards motherhood. Thanks Jodi!

Jodi Writes…

Discovering the the unspoken spaces of motherhood:

When your mind is racing and your body succumbs to the grips of anxiety, how do you release it all and reconnect with your inner calm?

I’ve had to ask myself these kinds of questions many times in recent years, especially through the challenges of trying to conceive and experiencing pregnancy loss. These things take a massive toll on us – mind, body and soul – yet so often we carry our burdens silently (Our Seva likes to call these the unspoken spaces of motherhood). In the initial years of my journey, I struggled immensely. My longing to have and hold my baby grew into a deep and profound ache as the prospect of becoming a mother felt more and more elusive. Depression set in, I felt disconnected from life and lost my trust in my body.

Finding safe & sacred spaces within:

Fortunately, at some point during a really low period in my life, I somehow gathered the strength to start creating a shift. This shift came about very slowly by taking small mindful steps to nurture myself each day. I soon found that tending to my inner self was an important part of preserving both my sanity and my emotional wellbeing. Leaning into grounding practices and routines offered me a sense of stability, inner calm and helped restore a positive outlook.

Self-care and mindfulness practices became gentle touchstones that anchored me in the present. They allowed me to cope better. There were many practices that I turned to – meditation, nature walks, yoga, working with my breath, journaling and art therapy. One thing that I’ve found most nourishing is my daily tea meditation ritual. As a tea enthusiast, I guess it’s felt so natural to lean into a daily practice that asks nothing of me other than to brew a pot of tea. I then sit down with a soothing cup as I simply disconnected from the mind chatter and take a moment to ground myself while sipping it. This simple act still feels like a deeply therapeutic experience.

In essence it opens up a safe and sacred space within me, where I can breathe, surrender and feel held in self-compassion.

A year ago, I hit another bump in my path to motherhood. I had an ectopic pregnancy and ended up having emergency surgery. I lost not only my baby, but a piece of my fertility too, since my right fallopian tube had ruptured and had to be removed. It was a devastating experience that took several months to recover from emotionally. It took everything that I had in me to work through the various layers of grief.

When I eventually felt ready to get back to trying to conceive again, I was overcome with unexpected bouts of anxiety and panic attacks. Trying to conceive has triggered post-traumatic stress disorder. My anxiety seemed heightened around my fertile window and the last two weeks of my cycle, the period of time referred to as the “two week wait” where you are waiting to find out if you are pregnant or not. Many women consider this time to be one of the most stressful periods of one’s fertility journey. It is a time where you are excited about the beautiful possibility of your body creating and bringing new life into the world. However, it is often also a time filled with moments of fear and anxiety as you start agonizing over whether or not things will happen for you.

The “two week wait” tends to trigger various negative beliefs about yourself and your body. In my case, I struggled with the fear that if I get pregnant again it would turn out to be another ectopic pregnancy. I guess that once you’ve experienced the worst case scenario the mind always goes to that place expecting that it will happen again. You’re fearful of reliving the same trauma, but this time…not being able to survive it. And so you remain in fight-or-flight mode, tense, anxious and mistrusting. To your post-trauma afflicted mind the world is a dangerous place and so the panic attacks start to take hold.

I took time to go for holistic therapy sessions to help process all that I was experiencing. Once again, my self-care practices played a big part in helping me move through the anxiety, find some healing and rebuilding my trust in my body.

And of course, my tea ritual was a soothing balm that invited me to detach from the overwhelming sense of anxiety during the ‘two week wait’ and cultivate stillness within.

I incorporated fertility affirmations and visualizations as part of my daily tea meditations. It was grounding to have a daily devotional to read and reflect on as I savored the quiet moment. This sacred space made room for me to let myself shed my body’s tension and sink into a place of peace.

Navigating the past year has reinforced just how important it is to create soul-nourishing routines to turn to when the going gets tough. Whether you journal and connect with your inner wisdom or just take a few minutes to breathe into your heart space, it’s so healing to carve out space for YOU and do the simple things that allow you to return to inner peace and love. This is how I cultivate inner calm. This is what feeds my soul. It keeps me balanced, brings balm to my wounds and ultimately renews my faith in the possibilities that the future, however uncertain it seems, may bring into my life.

5 steps to to a grounding tea meditation practice:

1 – Gather your favorite tea and tea ware. What kind of tea do you love? Do you have a favorite tea cup or tea pot? Choose what you love, things that inspire or soothe you so that you make the experience as enjoyable and enriching for yourself as possible.

2 – When you are ready to begin, fill your kettle, boil some water and make a delicious cup or pot of tea. Centre yourself while you do. Focusing on gratitude, be mindful of how the tea and your breath gift you an opportunity to nourish both your body and soul. Once you’ve made the tea, sit down in a quiet place where you can enjoy some alone time.

3 – Take a few deep breaths and sip your tea mindfully. Notice the comforting warmth of your cup. Take in the aroma, savor the taste and enjoy your quiet moment. Use all your senses!

4 – Feel yourself relax and breathe easier, allowing your sense of inner peace to expand.

5 – When you feel that you are grounded and calm, take your time as you reflect on your centering thoughts, a mantra or affirmation. If you like, you can read something inspiring, journal or simply relax quietly in your own presence as you continue to sip your tea.

Join Our Seva Motherhood Circle

In the Our Seva Motherhood Circle private Facebook group, we support one another through the ever-expanding anxieties women on the path to motherhood navigate on a daily basis. We honor and support one another’s winding path, knowing that beauty can be birthed from the uncertainty. We inspire one another to tap into the whispers of our inner wisdom and rally behind the many grounding practices that seem to be able to bring us back to our sacred centers. Together, we are shifting cultural narratives around shifting identities, maternal mental health, cultural expectations and our sacred service to motherhood. I’d love it if you join us!

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